There’s a time-tested, thoroughly ignored verse from the Bhagavad Gita that goes:
It is far better to perform one’s natural prescribed duty, though tinged with faults, than to perform another’s prescribed duty, though perfectly. In fact, it is preferable to die in the discharge of one’s duty, than to follow the path of another, which is fraught with danger.
Bhagavad Gita: Chapter 3, Verse 35
But why settle for your life when you can meddle in someone else’s?
Let’s face it. Indian families have redefined outsourcing. Not just in tech. But in emotions, parenting, finances, and especially—marriage management. We are experts in doing others’ dharma with laser precision, while our own lives smolder like unattended incense sticks.
To the Husband:
Dear Sir,
Your swadharma was to take out the trash and talk to your wife like a human, but somehow you’re now a full-time WhatsApp warrior in your in-laws’ group chat, explaining how your wife is wrong about everything—from raising the kids to cutting onions.
You don’t remember your anniversary without Google Calendar, but you remember her cousin’s misstep from 2007 and quote it like scripture. “I told you their family was like this.”
You were supposed to be the bridge between families.
But congratulations, you became the toll booth.
To the Wife:
Madam,
Your swadharma might involve balancing work, home, and sanity, but somehow you’ve been promoted (without consent) to Chief Executive of Your Husband’s Family Reform Program.
You’ve got a PhD in diagnosing his mother’s insecurities and a side hustle in convincing your own parents that your husband is a project, not a person.
You think you’re improving his family.
What you’re actually doing is auditing someone else’s karma account, while ignoring the spiritual bankruptcy in your own.
Remember: you didn’t marry a man, you married a reality show.
Now streaming on every phone call your relatives make.
To the Children:
Sweethearts,
Your swadharma is school, friends, growth, and probably not getting involved in whose mother insulted whose during Diwali 2022.
But no, you’ve been carefully trained to take sides, record fights, and whisper judgments like little moral auditors with excellent memory.
You’ve watched more courtroom drama at home than on TV.
You know who cried when, who “gaslighted” whom (though you spell it gas-lite), and who’s playing the victim this week.
You aren’t children anymore.
You’re evidence.
The Extended Family Bonus Pack:
This includes aunties who attend therapy via Instagram reels, uncles who are now karma consultants, and cousins who drop “just checking in” texts while conducting forensic analysis on your wedding photos.
They mean well.
Which is Sanskrit for “they will ruin your peace, but with blessings.”
Their motto:
“Fix thy neighbor’s fence even if your roof is on fire.”
Now, lets us delve into few scenarios:
1. The ‘Hyper-Attached’ Bhabhi Who Forgets Her Own Wedding Vows
Let’s start with the sister-in-law (Bhabhi) who maintains a daily phone call ritual with her parents, lovingly updates them on her baby’s bowel movement—but cannot digest the fact that her husband is talking to his sister once a week.
She casually drops gems like:
“I don’t interfere in your family, but if I were you, I’d never let your wife speak to her parents that way.”
Meanwhile, her husband hasn’t made eye contact with his own sister in 3 months because “Bhabhi doesn’t like drama.”
Motto: “My emotions are sacred. Yours are attention-seeking.”
2. The Brother-in-Law Who Is Basically an Inverted Therapist
This enlightened Jiju works 12 hours a day, buys his wife everything she points at, and their home is a temple of “mutual understanding.” But when he visits his brother’s house?
“Your wife is too dominating, yaar. You’ve changed. You used to be fun before marriage.”
He’ll say it with a chuckle, of course.
While his wife stares from behind, holding her remote-control leash.
His idea of help?
“Let me talk to her bro… woman to woman, maybe she’ll listen.”
Translation: Let me unleash psychological warfare with a hug and fake smile.
3. The Cousin Who Thinks She’s Karan Johar with a WhatsApp Account
She’s married into a family that runs like the Vatican—rules, rituals, WhatsApp curfews, and everyone speaks in whispers.
But when her cousin’s wife posts a dance reel?
“Are you okay with her doing this? I mean, just asking. You’re very modern I guess…”
Also her:
“Family means adjusting. Except for me. I have boundaries.”
Translation: “I will sabotage your marriage softly while growing indoor plants and preaching about mental health.”
4. The Sister Who Carries Childhood Trauma Like a Legal Document
She walks into her brother’s marriage like a referee in a boxing ring, constantly reminding everyone:
“You know, when I was a kid, mom always gave you more mangoes.”
So naturally, your wife is responsible for her 3rd-grade heartbreak.
She keeps her husband on a strict keto-marriage—no arguments, no opinions, just worship.
But in your house?
She arrives with all the spices.
“Don’t listen to her. You used to think for yourself.”
Her Doctrine: “I may not be happy—but by God, no one else should be either.”
5. The Silent Spectator Who Plants Landmines and Vanishes
This is the sibling who listens—oh, they listen like saints. They nod, validate, and then, at 2 AM, text the in-laws:
“Hope you’re okay. She seemed… off today. Just worried for you.”
And then?
They go back to their bubble bath and post quotes about “cutting toxic people off.”
Meanwhile, you’re managing an emotional earthquake triggered by a whisper.
Conclusion: Fix Thyself First.
These people run their homes like spiritual ashrams, complete with scented candles and “no negativity” policies. But the moment they step into your life, they become:
• Crisis consultants
• Emotional economists
• Marital saboteurs with a savior complex
And all the while, they quote “I’m just trying to help.”
Help? The Gita called. It said: Mind Your Own Dharma.
Because the only thing worse than doing someone else’s duty is doing it while believing you’re God’s HR manager.
Final Words (With Divine Backing):
The Gita didn’t say, “Perfect your mother-in-law’s marriage strategy.”
It said, do your own duty, even if it’s flawed.
So maybe, just maybe:
• Talk to your own spouse before you advise someone else’s.
• Parent your own kids before diagnosing someone else’s.
• Respect your limits before you colonize another family’s karma.
Because when you do someone else’s dharma, no matter how well—
you don’t just collect bad reviews.
You collect kilbisham (sin).
#StayInYourLane #DoYourDharma #FamilyDramaInc #BhagavadGitaForTheBold #GaslightGatekeepGita